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My Name is Major (Retd) Uri Brezhnev - ex KGB

On finding my cover blown, I found myself having to lay low for several decades waiting for the dust to settle.

Recently I felt it safe enough to venture out into the world once more, but now I must do this as a normal citizen.

On being discharged from the KGB with a new identity but not losing any of my old skills of mixing chemicals to sufficient strengths to kill a black bear. I decided to put these same skills to good use and invented my range of "Cossack Beard Oils"